While blogging might be a great way to journal about the joys and frustrations you’re experiencing as an au pair, having a live, public blog about life with your host family is something you should think twice about. Host families – even the coolest, most easygoing of host families – would probably rather not have their dirty laundry aired publicly on the world wide web. If you value your job and your relationship with your host parents, you’ll be very careful in what you write about them and their children on the internet.
Of course, if it is entirely anonymous and/or entirely positive, you might be able to pull if off. But if your blog can be traced to you and your family, then it might better to hold off – or else censor your thoughts – while you are living with and dependent on – your host family. Another option is to blog only (or at least mostly) about your life experiences beyond the au pair job, leaving the host family out of it. Considering all that you’re probably experiencing, you will probably be able to keep busy with the details of life outside your host family’s four walls.
If you still really want to keep a detailed account of your life as an au pair, including all the ups and downs, then do so, but save it for later. You can easily create a file to save your ‘diary’ entries, to consider posting online later (perhaps way later, depending on the content!). You can even change names to protect you and your host family.
Whatever you decide, keep your host family’s privacy, and your pride, in mind. In today’s world of brutal online honesty, prudence may be best!
January 26th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
Talya, thanks so much for this post.
As a host mom, I appreciate your suggestion that au pairs should hold off or hold back on anything negative, especially so the host kids can’t see.
For me as a host parent, one of the things about having an au pair is not so much the lack of privacy but the fear that someone might be judging me as a parent or as a person. So, even though anyone would have an opinion about what goes on in my home, I’d want her to either talk to me privately or deal with any concerns in a way that protected my reputation. In turn, I go out of my way to avoid talking about my au pair’s personal life (even when it’s really interesting!), so that she can have the same privacy among our family and friends.
March 18th, 2009 at 4:52 am
Is not always easy to have a private life when you have an au pair at home, and keep everything secret, but if she will stay a long time, you can always trust her more, and let her become a member, they usually respect your personal opinions and personal life, they are more interested in other things than the private life of the hosting family
March 23rd, 2009 at 8:10 pm
hy…we are an aupair young(22)couple…we have received only strange requests(they said that we would have to pay a travel agent or a lawyer)…we have received nothing serious yet..if you know a job for us in germany or austria…au pair(i could work as an aupair and my fiancee could find another job)or hosuekeeper or gardner..or anything…please contact me at dya_rosu@yahoo.com
March 24th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
Diana,
If you are serious about getting a job as an au pair, I would definitely consider a bonafide agency (such as those listed at the IAPA). I’m not quite sure how it would work out since you and your fiance are both looking for work, since au pairs are usually hired and given work permits for themselves. Your best bet is talking with an actual au pair agency.